Editorial
We're all going on a summer holiday... in fact I suspect that by the time this edition comes out a lot of you will already be there! What makes a really good holiday? We all have our own ideas, is it... getting away from routine, the chance to sleep late stay up half the night and party? Or maybe getting back to nature with a quiet retreat somewhere away from the frenetic pace of modern living? Perhaps you like spending time in the lap of luxury and letting someone else take care of the cooking while you lounge by the pool with something long and cool in your hand? Then of course you may spend your time learning a new skill or sport. Come on let us have your ideas/descriptions of the best holiday you have had, if you went to learn to sail did you? Or maybe you spent a week painting and sketching? riding a horse? On a cruise? We would love to know what you find relaxing so get in touch and let us know.

Happy holidays!
Editor

What a pleasant surprise!

From the moment the action commenced it proceeded at a cracking pace and I was soon spell-bound! This is as near to 'method acting' as I have ever come on the non-professional stage. Each member of the cast not only 'became' the character they were portraying, they also managed to inject their performances with just enough humour to keep the audience amused but not enough to detract from the plot or slow the action. Much of this is down to the direction and I was staggered to learn that this was a first attempt by the person in question!

I shall not single out any one member of the company for special mention, sufficient to say that as a team, including all the un-sung heroes back-stage, they put on a magnificent show!

If I had to criticise anything it would be the size of the audience. What an insult to this talented group of people, that so few could be bothered to come and watch them. Still, there is an irony here; all those non-attendees missed a fabulous show and it serves them jolly well right!

Well done RADSOC, when's the next production?

Alfred Cook
Moat Way,
Swavesey.

To Fred and Liz Waters Congratulations on your Ruby Wedding Anniversary "God Bless"
Lots of Love From Doreen, Roy, Dot & Kenny. Also Mike, Clare & Family

Flyers
No nothing to do with aviation, but the A5 flyers that we get asked to distribute with the Meridian sometimes. The June/July edition went out with a flyer that I knew nothing about and since we, as a magazine, do have certain criteria about what we accept I thought I ought to share these with you so we (or rather I) do not have this happening in future.

Flyers are not popular with our distributors as they make their job harder so we avoid accepting flyers unless they are for:

• Village organisations (non -profit making)
  
• Charity.
  
• Community education.
  
• Local school events (pre-school, primary school and village college)
  

We do not accept flyers from commercial concerns, the magazine has advertising space and since it is delivered to every house in the village feel that flyers are just repeating what is already there. Yes I know this means that copy has to be with us by a certain date but in business most people plan well ahead anyway.
Please could I ask everyone to remember this, and also that A5 flyers have to be agreed with me in advance, and that if I feel it will cause problems for our distributors for any reason I may say no to your request. For example the distribution of this edition has had to be masterminded by a different person as Brenda is away for a family wedding so additional work created by flyers would not have been welcome!

Thank you for your co-operation and understanding
Editor.

Yes now we've had the longest day
And we'll soon put away the buckets and spades
It is time to think about your sight
As summer days draw to winter nights.

As September looms and a new school year
There is much to see and much to hear
So beat the rush and have a test
Make sure you always do your best.

Some of us we love to read
Books, newspapers and magazines is all we need
We really want to read them all
We' re quite engrossed and won't hear you call

For some the TV they love to watch
And 'Millionaire' they always catch
The questions sometimes are a blur
And right answers just never occur

For many folks the test is free
We really want to help you see
Our ad it gives you all the facts
We dispense all specs and contacts

Are you going back to teach
And left your glasses on a sandy beach?
Or perhaps it's just a screw you need
To fix your specs for you to read.

If anything makes you feel perplexed
It is making do with wonky specs
You've struggled along as best you can
Now see our opticians both woman and man

So hurry along and beat the rush
Don't get trodden in the crush
Come along and see us soon
Before we witness the next full moon.

As days get shorter and nights get longer our thoughts turn to the new school year and evenings reading. Have you had your eyes tested recently? A check up is always a good idea as certain illnesses can be detected, ideally every two years or every year if you have diabetes yourself, or a close relative with a history of glaucoma. So beat the rush before the holidays end and everyone gears up for Christmas again! We have a varied selection of frames from designer through to budget frames. We are also able to offer contact lenses and look forward to seeing you soon.

Swavesey Primary School Require Relief Midday Supervisors
1 hour a day (12 - 1pm) with probability of permanent post from 3rd September - £5.45 per hour. Please contact the Headteacher,Mr. Major - on 01954 273312

Swavesey Primary School Require A Cleaner
10 hours per week, £5.33 per hour 3.30 - 5.30pm approx. Please contact Andy Gibson, CCS, on 01354 657739

In the meantime, you will be able to use the Library as normal until the day it closes. Any requests for books, videos etc, will be accompanied by a choice of pick-up point, be it the Mobile Library stopping in the village or another library. The nearest libraries are Bar Hill, Willingham and St Ives (next to Waitrose).

There is a Doorstep Service available for anyone who has limited mobility. This involves having someone allocated to you who will talk to you about the kind of books you are interested in reading and then going to a Library and choosing appropriately for you. If you feel this Service may be for you, please feel free to contact any Library for further information.

There are people out there who must be ill. He, she, or them dislike wash-basins fitted with plugs and chains, even plugs without chains. They travel widely throughout Europe and Africa systematically removing all the plugs from public wash-basins, baths and many others. This inevitably occurs just before I arrive to wash my hands, face, socks and underwear, and makes these tasks very difficult. Any soap goes strait down the drain and it is impossible to submerge anything in water.

In Poland, Hungary, Slovakia and in many African countries I became accustomed to travelling with an assortment of plugs to suit most basins but the situation is now becoming universal and very difficult.

In France a more radical approach is sometimes adopted. In la chambre de sanitaire a long trough is often installed provided with a number of cold water taps above. The waste water flows along the trough to an open end from where it discharges to an open drain in the floor beneath. This makes washing and rinsing anything very difficult, but it does outwit the plug snatchers. To make things even more perfidious the taps are frequently of a cunning design that have to be pushed manually to obtain a flow of water. The flow stops automatically fifteen seconds after the pressure on the tap is released, on the assumption that this is quite sufficient for normal people to wash themselves, complete their ablutions and brush their teeth using both hands. Other taps may be of a more devious design which can only be operated by pushing with the combined strength of both thumbs on the top. The result of this Herculean task may produce a jet of water sufficient to soak all those people standing nearby including yourself. The purpose of these taps appears to be to save water and prevent anybody from washing themselves with their own hands.

After a month of cruising around the Baltic in a small yacht: in Germany, Denmark and Sweden without a collection of universal plugs, I can now state that it has become almost impossible to find a basin fitted with a plug and chain in any of the fifteen Marina wash-houses and latrines visited. Only one plug chained to one basin out of the sixteen basins provided at The British Kiel Yacht Club had escaped the attention of the master plug snatcher. Even as I write this I am certain that his or her lack of attention will have been corrected and the remaining plug will have been removed. This has now been confirmed.

What is this fetish for removing plugs from public wash-basins? Do these perverts collect the plugs and chains for monetary gain, or to use them for playing conkers. Perhaps they like to prevent people from washing themselves and the local Chamber of Commerce likes to use every ruse to force people to wash their clothes in an expensive launderette?

There is a possible culprit but I have no proof. It may be the gentleman who always books into hotels before me, into the next room, wherever I go. He spends all night pushing his heavy furniture, devoid of castors, up and down the marble floors trying to create a happy synergy and creates a horrible cacophony in his vain attempts at feng-shui. The noise is always sufficient to prevent the possibility of any sleep and has been known to make sane people travel and sleep in small yachts for the rest of their lives.. This gentleman must suffer from insomnia and is unable to get his feng-shui just right. Rumour has it that he is of Romanian, or Hungarian descent, is very tall and always travels alone in a large pantechnicon containing his heavy furniture full of plugs and chains. In a vain attempt to remain incognito he always wears a large dark cloak with a high collar and a large rimmed dark felt hat which he never removes. Nobody has ever seen his face.

My suspicions may be completely wrong and it could be that we are faced with a growing army of people suffering from schistosamiasis, frightened of bilharzia or other water-borne diseases.

After observing the disappearance of plugs and chains from basins and baths in hostels, hotels, toilets and marinas throughout Europe and parts of Africa for at least thirty years I find the situation is becoming endemic, unhygienic, even sinister. Some hotels have totally dispensed with plugs and have installed basins and baths with flush drains, fitted with perforated domed covers, into which plugs can not be fitted. Their commercial managers have realised that this together with a stratagem of heating the hot-water to a dangerously high temperature is a very effective way of reducing the costs of their metered water supply at a risk of scalding the hands of a few guests. Informed people have suggested that hot-water-tanks now have to be maintained at unbearably high temperatures to prevent the development of legionnaires disease. If this is true, due to some obscure EE Regulation, travellers will need to carry their own plastic basin with a length of hose to obtain the desired mix of hot and cold water to wash hands, feet, clothes, etc. without getting burnt When this stratagem is adopted everywhere it will make the plug-snatchers redundant and I fear they may turn their attention to removing lavatory seats in their attempts to make life more unsavoury.

To me a basin or bath without a plug is as useless as a shower or swimming pool without any water.

Does anybody know what is happening, or am I just becoming grumpy and developing a psychosis because I haven't yet caught bilharzia or legionnaires disease?

Tim T Phillips 4/6/03 © Copyright